Draft:Bears and crocodiles analogy

From the change wiki

We have to reconcile two contrasting pieces of advice that people often say:

  1. Always be willing to fight. Don't appease people or they will walk all over you.
  2. Avoid the fight. It's not worth getting injured over small things, even if you win.

People who always live by Advice 1 will get in needless fights.
People who always live by Advice 2 will get taken advantage of.

Clearly a balance should be found. I propose another way of looking at it:

  • Advice 1 is for when you're dealing with a crocodile.
  • Advice 2 is for when you're dealing with a bear.

Let's unpack what that means...

Both crocodiles and bears are extremely aggressive. Both can kill you - but for very different reasons, in general:

  • The bear sees you as a threat to its territory. It might be paranoid that you're trying to eat its children, etc.
  • The crocodile just wants to eat you. There is no negotiating.

This is an analogy for types of people (enemies) you might deal with:









(chronically following Advice 1 would make you the bear, btw)

TODO

Before i finish writing this page, gotta figure out how to address a few nuances:

  • mixed enemies who sometimes act crocodile-like and sometimes bear-like: how common are they? is it a continuum?
  • what about crocodiles who masquerade as bears, in order to try and have more legitimacy?
  • specific examples: hitler, putin, isis, ...
  • wars are most often between two bears, each thinking the other is a crocodile?
  • bar fights are often between two bears?
  • what about domestic abuse cases, how would they be understood by this model?
  • what about for defenseless people, any advice or there just isnt?
  • so who are we giving advice to? individuals and nation-states, teach them how not to be a bear? negotiate better? what's the solution really?